Entry #001

Hello. My name Is Artie Milano. As of today I am 14 years old. I think my life is very unique, dispite the fact that I fell down a basement stairway at 10 months.

Life is great right now. Well, restricting the fact of the person I think I'm in love with.

I don't believe you can have true love at this age. But why wait. We need to live this living hell of earth. Have fun with your life. Relationship or not. Never let your so called love get to you.

That's all I can say. My opinion surely will change.

And yes. There is a girl.
The one who made me stop "whoring" over other girls.
I'm tearing right now just realizing how much I like this girl.
I'm sorry I can't tell you who.
I'm really upset about the ones that know.

I have liked her for almost 3 months. And not because the fact that she is beautiful or anything else a shallow fuck wants.

She reminds me of me. And most importantly the kind of person I want to be with.
I love her ways, her personality, the way I feel around her. And no, she does NOT relate to an R&B song I hear on the radio. Oh come on you corny freaks.

I didn't mean to use the "L" word. Too powerful, I need to know when to actually use it.

I support fake love.
I support gay love.
I support lust love.
I support drama love.
I support ghetto love.
I support one-night-stands.
Why?

Look. The gay love part is an acception but the other ones; I want people out there to realize their dumb decisions and live their own way. They can do what they want.

Leave the ones that want the real thing be. And we'll leave you other types of love be too. Our world needs varieties.

A world with a sunny day everyday would get boring.
That's why we need to look foward things in life.
Remember that emo ones.
Just because you don't get who and what you wan't doesn't mean your life should be over.
You need to get yourself over it. Move on.
Goddamn.

Enough of love talk.
I will admit I have problems.

1. Procrastination - I take almost everything to the last minute. That's why I almost failed 8th.
2. Sexuality - I masturbate regularly and almost at a daily rate. I'm trying to stop for a bit. I am currently on day 7.
3. People Pleaser - I never want to do something somebody feels uncomfortable with. I always want people to feel happier for me. Especially with my relationship life. I do anything for them. Also in pornography, I can not watch something that obviously shows displeasement/hatred in the mate. I am obviously a sensitive pervert.
   
4. Childness - I need to grow up.
5. Maturity - I also need to loosen up.
6. Low Self-Esteem - It will take a lot for me to apreciate myself in life again.
7. Love - I don't want to love this girl just to let you all know. But I do.
8. Guitar - I'm too obsessed with it. My friends do get annoyed when I hog it from them. I am greedy about it. I can't help it. I love music.
9. Crying - You will probably never see me cry. But I do cry. Over her, over music, over playing/singing music, realization over hopelessness, acne realization.
10. Computers - I need to start using them less and get out.

1:36 AM
Sunday, June 17, 2007.